Graduations

Spring is here again (finally) which means graduations, parties, saying goodbye,  flowers, holidays and change. At my last visit to the big Junior High School I was given a package of letters addressed ‘to the ALTs’ from the graduating third graders, saying thank you for two years of occasional English. They ranged from ‘I enjoyed game’ to more detailed messages such as ‘thank you for teaching English and abroad culture for us. We had a good time at the ALT. I will go to foreign country and use English taught by you’ Here are some highlights (and this formatting is frustrating):

 ”Thank you for teaching us English. It was very fun. See you again.

PS JEF UNITED ICHIHARA CHIBA is very strong team!! Soccer is interesting”

(I finally asked this girl is JEF United are good at soccer last week. Her reply was あまり- not really)

“thaksyou. With all my heart <3″

(this next one was written all in katakana)

“I am a Manchester United fan. We won’t lost to Liverpool!! Gerrard’s kick is the best!! Please come to [name of Izakaya we sometimes go to for 三次会s] and have a conversation. see you SAM day”

“genki de ne <3

your happy <3

ba—-i [picture of hand waving]“

“thank you for real English”

“At the time of class of the ALT, I was very happy. The various time when I played a game was the most pleasant in that.

Thank you very much so far”

“Thank you for teaching us English. It was exciting”

“Thans. See you again. Take care” (this boy spelt Sam’s name wrong)

“I like you [picture of smiling face giving peace sign]“

“thank you very much. three years. very good class”

one boy made up Kanji for my name: 流胃酢 style of/stomach/vinegar. And then thanked me from the bottom of his heart.

“I learned many things from you. Thanks to you I became interested in English. Please check with a dictionary.” (I’m not sure about the last part. What am I meant to check?)

“I don’t like English, but I came to like English. Sam & Louis are BEST OF TEACHER”

“English very X100000 difficult…but ALT is very interested”

“Thank you very much. The English was very fun. I want to change myself. I will try to do every thing and enjoy doing it”

“If I am going to meet studying English peaple, I will said “America and Australia are lived by great English teacher. Their name is Sam and Louis.”

“Thank you so much for the last two years. I couldn’t grow up without you!! You changed my life!! I wish your happiness!! See you someday!! Your forever student Kento”

I worry about that boy sometimes.

 

Lesson Planning

Just a quick note as to why elementary school teachers in this country should never be required to teach English. Here is the model conversation from my lesson plan for tomorrow:

T: What’s this?
C: It’s a spoon.
T: I wish spoon
(I boil the water. I make cookies)

And that’s one of the better ones. Only one piece of complete nonsense. It’s nothing compared to one school who always finishes their lesson plans with
‘This is a plan. Except this is sufficient. Please simplify a low grade. You may not be this plan.’

The second school puts effort into their lesson plans, they’re just not always the best. The first one reuses the same lesson plans they have used since the dawn of time, forgets my name and generally seems to not do much in the way of helping me teach (when I’m meant to be the assistant). This makes me feel less bad about planning my own, completely unrelated, lessons.

They also refer to me as an ART, because (obviously) I Assist in the Teaching of Ranguage.

 

Planning for home…not sure where home is…

The Tim Tams I found on my desk this morning made me a little 懐かしい、and the open window means I have to wear a scarf at my desk (I shouldn’t have decided against the jacket this morning), add that to the general fatigue related ennui, I was pleased to flip open my diary and find that I will be on my way back to Australia in seven and a half weeks.

But that number is bigger than I thought.

I keep saying I’m going home but home is a slippery concept, considering I live and work here, and have for the past year and a bit, which is about as long as I’ve lived in any single house since high school. Without dragging out tired cliches (wow, I just did then) I don’t actually know where my heart is now. Shimizu? Kochi? Shimokitazawa? Perth? Somewhere else? But I have been gathering a list of things I miss, things I will be hoping to spend my 16 days in Western Australia doing.

First is the list of things I want to do in Melbourne:

Shopping- Genki, that vegan shoe store I’ve never been able to find, Chapel St, basically anywhere.

Coffee- my first port of call will be a cafe, any cafe. I’ll get to Flinders St (nerdy side point; my favourite train station in the world) walk up to federation square, get coffee and then search out Dad’s apartment.

Drinking- The Girsch Institute (I hope it’s as dead-quiet as last time, that was awesome. It really added to the atmosphere of the bar to be the only ones there. All night. We were the only people out on the stormiest January night in Melbourne history, except for a bunch of backpackers who of course had no idea about this bar)

People watching- can be done anywhere.

Public transport- although this will be more of an unavoidable fact of life than anything I’ll go out of my way to do.

The on to Perth for more of the same. Plus:

The boxing day test

Beer and Pizza at Little Creatures

Actual vegetarian food at Analakshmi, That Hare Krishna restaurant whose name I forget, Lotus, Maoz, possibly even a trip out to Curtin just for kebabs

Beer and Frits at the Belgian Beer Cafe

Maybe Pizza at Centrepoint, and I might make a mix CD of Japanese experimental music for John

Beer and…food, I guess, at the Parky

Coffee, shopping and indy film in Leederville.

Coffee, shopping and maybe more indy film in Mt Lawley

Burgers at Alfred’s

Burgers and a $5 shake at Retro Betty’s

Crepes, cherries, shopping at Fremantle Markets

Picnic in King’s Park, with cheese, olives, sundried tomatoes, bread, Tim Tams, Ocean Spray Red Grapefruit juice!!!

Rottnest and the Pinnacles, because it’s been a while

Margaret River for Southbound, and hopefully a day at the beach

Swapping of books (I’m thinking of reading Crime and Punishment on the way, giving it to Dad in Melbourne because I will have finished it during my ten hour transit in Thailand, and picking up other books as I go along, leaving ones I’ve read behind to save space in my suitcase)

 

I will make a similar list of things to do during my four day return transit in Thailand. And maybe one for me eight hours in Fukuoka. Although that will either be spent meeting old friends or relaxing in a public bath. Next week in Tokyo I will set out a detailed plan so I can probably not actually follow it and just spend the whole time doing whatever. I’ll try to get a phone so people can contact me. Although of course every time it rings I’ll have to say もしもし just because I’m a real Japanese Salary Man now.

 

So busy

This is amazing in its truthfulness. Japan does go crazy about fads. This one just sucks when you want to make banana lassi for 100 people (we can go into that next week when I’m not so busy)

But here it is, the latest craze sweeping Japan.

 

This blog goes down the toilet as of….now

Yesterday, for only the second time in my life, I used a Japanese-style toilet in its intended manner.
(and here, for the sake of avoiding TMI, I will do my utmost to NOT use word squat, any reference to what goes in the toilet will be avoided as far as possible, and description will be kept to a minimum. Should I fail in not grossing everyone out, I apologize)
And by that I mean I used it for that which it is intended for, and not entirely by choice. You see both times I was forced through circumstances to use the Japanese-style toilets. First was before I realised there was a western-style toilet downstairs at city hall, albeit a western-style toilet where I can’t sit down without my knees hitting the wall. I used the toilet nearest to my office, and let me tell you, business shoes and suit pants are not ideal for the purpose. Let me tell you why:
There is an art to using a Japanese-style toilet. Basically it involves taking your pants off while keeping your shoes on. The reason you take your pants off is quite obvious (and I don’t think there’s a way around it) and the reason you keep your shoes on should be equally obvious. Now in theory this is good- no part of you ever touches any part of the facility except the toilet paper. You don’t have to sit on a seat millions before you have sat on. It is, in theory, far far more sanitary. Even in gross public toilets you can use the facilities without much worry, although you may have to bring your own toilet paper (which, I’ve been told, is what you use all the free tissue handouts for. No-one thinks to use them to blow their nose because it’s so impolite. NO, they just sniff loudly and openly, as if displaying this as a form of good hygeine, even when serving me at.a.restaurant)
Another unrelated offshoot of Japanese style toilets is that the men’s toilets are always closer to the entrance than the woman’s. Let me explain.
A few years ago a friend of mine complained that at every shopping centre in Australia the men’s toilets are past the women’s toilets, down at the end of the corridor. I developed a theory for this; urinals are easier to carry than sit-down toilets. The women’s toilets have a far lower urinal-to-toilet ratio, so therefore more things that are heavy and hard-to-carry. In Japan it’s the opposite, urinals are bigger and heavier than Japanese-style toilets, so the men’s toilets are first in the corridor and the women’s are further back. If you don’t believe me check it out next time you’re at a shopping centre, or anywhere with toilets down a corridor.
SO anyway, the second time was alright. It was in a set of facilities that I would have otherwise not liked to go in, but didn’t have to touch so it was alright. I was wearing thongs and loose shorts so getting the pants off (and back on) was easy, but there is still one thing I can’t agree with (and this is the only part with real danger of going into TMI territory) in Japanese-style toilets it’s all there below you. It all just sits there in the little ceramic trough. Smelly. Visible. Urgh. So glad my toilet at home is western-style, with a magic flap that makes everything disappear. And a water gun used to clean it when the flush isn’t enough. It’s also the warmest room in my house, and gets fantastic early morning sun. Great for reading the paper.

Is that TMI?

On the other hand this town is full of hippies who like eco toilets. They’re cool. Everything is eaten up by bacteria, and has a nice piney fragrance. I can dig that.

 

Edit: Another thing about toilets in Japan. Every single toilet, toilet fitting or piece of plumbing in this country is made by a company called Toto. Their company name is on everything. As such I cannot enter any bathroom without singing “Africa” in my head.

*I hear the drums echoing tonight, but she hears only whispers of some quiet conversation…*

 

The Olympic Dream

This might seem behind the times, but it’s not, in fact it’s years ahead. Or really it’s a week too late to be years ahead, and now people are past caring, but I’ll write it anyway.

In an underground passageway in Shinjuku station (the busiest in the world in terms of passengers) there’s a poster I saw almost everyday on the way to the JET orientation. Some days it was early morning and I was running late, so I hardly gave it a glance, and on other days I slowed right down to have a good look at it. It’s a really inspiring ad, children running through a green field on a clear day, towards a garden stylised to look like the Tokyo 2016 Olypmic bid emblem. Two young children are at the front, smiling at the camera with big teethy grins. It’s just uplifting. The message underneath reads 日本で、オリンピックを。 “In Japan, the Olympics” It’s that simple, but like many others, I’m　a sucker for smiling children, and I’m a sucker for the olympics. Despite the human rights record in China, all the unaddressed concerns and the feeling that it was a show of national solidarity not unlike Hitler’s 1936 Olympics (and before any cries Reductio ad Hitlerum, I’m the first to acknowledge it), despite all the faults with the Japanese TV coverage, the olympics really do something to me. They make me happy. They make me consider the transcendant nature of sport, how in theory (but not in practice) it can transcend national differences.

But then I thought back to all the times the Olympics have been politicized- Berlin, 1936, the Hungarian-Soviet water polo match in Melbourne in 1956, the multi-national boycott of Montreal in 1976, over a tour of apartheid South Africa by the All Blacks (vaguely sports related, but a political move), the US boycott of Moscow, 1980 (as a protest against the Soviet invasion of Afghanistan) and the retaliatory boycott by Soviet nations of the Los Angeles games in 1980. Taiwan boycotted the 1980 Winter Olympics over the fact that it was forced to compete under the name of Chinese Taipei, not it’s official name (recognized by almost no-one now), Republic of China. There was the massacre of Israeli athletes by the terrorist group Black September in Munich in 1972, and the detonating of a bomb in a public square during the 1996 games in Atlanta. The days of the Olympics being non-political are as far-gone as the days of them being amatuer. This is not always bad, Cathy Freeman carrying both the Aboriginal and Australian flags following her 400m win in Sydney, or the two American runners holding up their fists in the black power salute in Mexico City, 1968.

The Olympics have become a show of national strength for the host country, but have also tended to highlight their weaknesses. Beijing’s air quality and China’s human rights problems were (justifiably) bought into focus by these Olympics, which were among the most expensive ever. London’s failures, it’s decline as a world centre, are being highlighted in the leadup to the 2012 games. With a crumbling underground system, and stations closed for years while they’re upgraded to allow disabled access, with the controversial and unpopular site being built on industrial wasteland, and looking to become a repeat of the millenium dome. I do remember, however that Athens had looked like it was not going to be ready, and that was a pretty successful Olympics.

The original reason for this post was musings about what I would be doing in 2016, what Tokyo would look like, where I’d be, and if Tokyo got the Olympics (it’s the front runner) how that would make me feel. It already feels a lot like Japan is my home, and hopefully in eight years time I will have more than a decent grasp on the language (like enough to get a job translating/embassying) Tokyo really has an oppurtunity to surpass everyone, to put the most compact, green Olympics ever on. Tokyo has none of the pollution problems of Beijing and other Asian cities (“out there,” the hostel owner in Taipei said, pointing out our window “you can see tallest building in world. On clear day.” And sure enough, the next day, poking out of the smog and foggy rain was the top of Taipei 101) it has the best public transport in the world and could easily improve on it, as it did in creating the Tokkaido Shinkansen, the world’s first high speed train, linking Osaka to Tokyo and open in time for the 1964 games, and the Nagano Shinkansen in time for 1998 winter games. It’d be cool to see the current public transport system greened up, with more solar power and more trains, but with the current debt levels and the government spewing money on an aging population that is starting to look unlikely. But the day Tokyo creates a truly green games, on that day I would be able to say honestly and simply the reasons I’ve come to love Japan. I’d love to work at a green Tokyo Olympics, to take part in it. I feel that it could be something great, something inspirational, what the games are meant to be, a green version of Sydney, basically, only this time I’ll be in the country to see it.

More information on the Tokyo 2016 Bid

 

While I type up a new post, here’s something I prepared earlier

Yesterday there was a breaking news story about a monkey that was spotted at Shibuya station and, after twenty minutes sitting on top of signage for the Tokyo Tokyu Toyoko line (now that’s a mouthful) managed to elude police and run out of the station, skirted dangerously close to the busiest pedestrain intersection in the world, turned onto a back street and climbed onto the Yamanote Line, heading towards Harajuku. The monkey wasn’t seen after that- if it made it without getting hit by trains it could have either found its way onto Takeshita St (which to this day I still refuse to pronounce correctly) in Harajuku, freaking out a lot of freaks, or could be somewhere in Yoyogi park, which is probably slightly better until the bands start playing. The report, which lasted twenty minutes of live crosses and people with cameras chasing after a running furball, was a welcome respite from Japan’s skewed coverage of the Olympics. I enjoyed the softball though, and the table tennis. I still refuse to call baseball interesting. Not as interesting as a monkey running around terrorising Tokyo.

I have a plan now, a plan that I may have had before but now it seems more like a realistic goal. With a million yen of savings per year for the whole time I’m in Japan (I can do that pretty easily, probably more) which could be two years or it could be five, I would start in Southern Japan during the summer Seishun-18 time, explore the whole of Japan on rediculously cheap local trains, get up to Wakkanai in Northern Hokkaido and then ferry across to Vladivostock, and then from there travel by train across to St Petersburg, etc. etc. onto London. With something like $30,000 to spend that could make for a pretty sweet holiday, and I could come back to Australia in February or Japan in April, to study…this is at least a year away, probably more. Re-contracting information comes out in October, hopefully before I go up to Tokyo to see Radiohead.

The convenience store in Shiomi-Cho is opening next month. Nothing to say there except it will be convenient. Ice cream at any hour of the day or night. And, you know, other conveniences like not-very-good onigiri, small dodgy condoms, hot canned coffee even in summer, and not having to make breakfast every day. And alcohol, because that’s exactly what I need more of. But it will be good to have the after-party option, after the liquor store closes at eight.

On that matter I’m giving up drinking, except at office events. For the sake of money and because I felt like I was drinking just because. Also because my belly is getting a bit more belly-tastic. I’m also trying to cu back on crap, getting rid of one of my surfboards, organising and actually reading my books, finally getting through Guardian Weeklies and London Review of Books(s) that I’ve been meaning to catch up on properly since May.

I’m starting a Kumon correspondence Japanese course, far more expensive than the alternative (just learning it myself and speaking Japanese to people) but I’ve found I need motiviation to study. Hence I also may sit the JLPT again in June or December next year, level 2 again is my score isn’t very good, and a dismal attempt at level one if my score is good.

Meeting an ALT who did my job five years ago made me feel that my time here will have to end one day. The three year rule no longer applies, and maybe by the time I’m here for five years it will have been extended. Who knows. Five years is a long time though- a long time without lasagne, a long time to have the same song stuck in your head (when I get back to Perth I want to blow you all away with my karaoke. It may not be good but it is enthusiastic), a long time to be in a long distance relationship, a long time without real vegetarian food and real cafes. I’ve heard the longer you live here the harder it is to go back to somewhere not so green, not so safe, harder to get away from well paid, easy work. But I have no reason to get away yet.

I’ve made two discoveries that make being vegetarian in Japan far easier- fish stock does not actually enhance the taste of yakisoba, and miso soup doesn’t actually taste very good. Now I’ve just got to find sauces without fish in them.

The yogurt lady is here, reminding me that paisley is an undervalued fabric.

 

久しぶり

It’s been a busy summer, except when I’m at the office, of course. Other than one morning cutting and bundling rice with one of the elementary schools, and a couple of afternoons swimming with the First to Fourth graders at another Elementary school (dear god, their little grabbing hands, their claws, their constant demands…bless ‘em) work has been uneventful- But outside of work, it’s just going home to festivals, five or so visits to the beach a week (I am now officially tanned and buff- although more burnt really) climbing Mt Fuji, greeting new JETs in Tokyo and organising events for them down here. I also bought The Sims 2 today (not sure why really…Maybe I don’t have enough distractions- my excuse is it will get me through winter and save me from spending money I don’t need to spend) In English though, so I can’t even call that Japanese study.

Speaking of Japanese study, I’ve been getting quite addicted to かきとりくん on DS, which I accidentally bought on my first day in Japan thinking it was a dictionary (needless to say, my Japanese has improved since then). Every day an animated man greets me, saying 久しぶり If I haven’t practiced for a while, wearing a suit on weekdays and a hawaiian shirt and shorts on weekends. His parting words are はりきってはじめましょう- harikitte hajimemashou, which I didn’t think about at first until Mum mentioned Harikiri- the western mispronunciation of 腹切, the samurai ritual suicide- the characters literally mean ’stomach cut’. So I had to look up what はりきってはじめましょう　meant, it turns out 張り切る means ‘to do enthusiastically. So he is not ordering me to perform ritual suicide, but to do my best! Isn’t that reassuring?

 

Things I learnt from from first year in 日本

A list in chronological order, that being the chronology of the time I thought of it.

• Japanese convenience stores keep their hangover cures next to their alcohol, in some cases mingled between it. This is convenient if you buy them together, not so if you go searching for lemonade and ‘ウコンの力’　after a heavy night and the very sight of alcohol makes you retch. Lesson learnt.
• The best omiyage is that which is purchased at the last minute. Closing stores, highway stops, train station convenience stores, all make for successful sweets to bring back to the office.
• Japanese houses were not designed with Japanese weather in mind- they let the heat in and the cold out in summer, and the heat out and the cold in in winter.
• Seishun-18 is the way to go when you want to travel. An eighth to a twentieth of the price of the bullet train, and with actual views out the windows. Failing that night buses work.
• Engrish is often created by someone who speaks English well but has a sick sense of humour. Case in point- attractive girl, mid twenties, black dress with elegant gold writing which reads ‘I’m built like a brick shithouse’
• The Japanese that barely got me through university is not the Japanese that is spoken here. Neither is it the Japanese that is spoken in Tokyo. I should’ve studied.
• Even in the absolute bottom of rural nowhere I still don’t have enough time to do everything I want- thus guitar, writing and studying have all fallen a bit to the wayside.
• I like the beach. I like nature. I like cities. I like trains. I like old abandoned buildings with trees overhanging and cicadas chirping. I like kids.
• There is so much to see in the world outside of Perth, outside of cities, outside of popular tourist destinations, outside of your comfort zone.
• I no longer know how or when to give up. With perhaps one or two exceptions. But when it comes to going up mountains without a care of how I’ll get down, well, I don’t let sense stop me. I still have an injury on my leg from Niseko, not to mention Fuji.
• Being vegan is easy, healthy, cheap and tasty. I will be mostly vegan again when I leave here.
• I have lots of plans for my future but still no plans to ever leave here.
• Stereotypes are often wrong, but it’s fun to wonder where they come from. Or to be proved wrong.
• I like to be proved wrong, but only after the fact. A long time usually.

And that is all for now. Really they seem to be just things I learnt about myself in my first year here. Maybe they are. Maybe they are.

 

Haiku

I was asked to do a short speech on Japanese culture, such as haiku, for my smallest Junior High School, so I thought I’d rattle off a quick worksheet. Here are nine Japanese haikus, with English translations, most of which I wrote this morning. The activity for the kids is to match the English with the Japanese.

Obviously this post just has the Japanese followed immediately by the English translation. The worksheet isn’t quite so easy.

 

朝のコーヒー

美しい日の出

早すぎる！

A morning coffee

A beautiful sunrise

It’s too early!

 

ピアノの音

人がないの部屋

怖いだね

The piano plays

A room with no-one in it

Isn’t it scary?

 

朝の雨

フロントガラス

事故しまった

Morning rain

A car’s windshield

There’s an accident!

 

夏の夕日

西に見ている

目が痛い

The summer sunset

Looking to the west

Hurts my eyes

 

鳥の鳴く

恋しくなった

夏の声

The bird’s chirp

I’ve come to love

The voice of summer

 

白蝶々

暖かい昼

私達の

White butterflies

A warm midday

Are our’s to share

 

夏の夜

蛍の光る

追いましょう

A summer night

A firefly’s glow

Let’s follow it

 

雨の時

蝶々は

どこに行く？

When it rains

The butterflies

Where do they go?

 

携帯の音

授業の間

誰のですか？

A mobile rings

In the middle of class

Whose is it?